A Therapist Shares 7 Possibilities that May be the Cause of Your Child’s Behavioral Issues
Sometimes kids start acting out by having temper tantrums/meltdowns, being defiant, or having explosive reactions. If this is happening in your household out of nowhere and more than just occasionally, you are probably starting to become concerned, confused, and frustrated. It’s not an easy thing to manage as parents, and you may feel like you need to walk on eggshells.
A good first step is trying to find a possible trigger for the behavior, and the reasoning behind it may not be obvious.
Young children have a difficult time managing their emotions because they have not yet acquired the necessary skills to do so, and also their brains are still developing. On top of that, they do not have the extensive emotional vocabulary that adults do, so they struggle to communicate their emotions as well, creating more frustration.
Because of all this, kids have a hard time expressing themselves, calming themselves down, and regulating themselves. What you see is a child having a disproportionate reaction or meltdown out of nowhere, but what is really happening is more than meets the eye.
Here is a list of possible causes of behavioral issues in children with a short explanation as to why it may happen.
Trauma:
if your child has a history of trauma or has experienced a traumatic event, they may have a difficult time managing their big emotions.
this could be for a variety of reasons, but a common reason is that perhaps the traumatic experience has interrupted their emotional development in whatever developmental stage it occurred.
because of this, they may have a harder time calming themselves down.
Anxiety:
some people make the assumption that anxious kids are overly cautious and shy. However, when a kid is in a situation that makes them feel anxious, it is very common for them to act out and have a meltdown.
when a child is lashing out, it could be for a variety of reasons, one of them being they are trying to avoid or escape the anxiety-triggering situation. It’s important to remember that “fight, flight, and freeze” are the three reaction styles to anxiety, and some kids can become irritable or even destructive as a response to their feelings of anxiety.
another reason is that kids who struggle with anxiety tend to be hard on themselves and a little more self-critical. This can result in an explosive reaction over seemingly nothing, but at the heart of it, they are feeling extremely frustrated.
Depression:
another reason for behavioral problems in kids (that tends to perplex people) is depression.
kids who struggle with depression can have temper tantrums and be very irritable, because they do not know how to express their feelings and do not understand them.
they tend to view things more negatively, and may get frustrated with themselves as well but not have the right words to explain that to an adult.
ADHD:
Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder can cause outbursts and behavioral problems in kids as well.
kids who have ADHD may ignore instructions or refuse to do things they do not want to do, and trying to get them to follow their daily routines and chores may be an uphill battle.
additionally, kids with ADHD struggle with impulse control, so their reactions to disputes may seem disproportionate (such as hitting, pushing, or throwing things) and cause them to get in trouble in school.
Learning Disorders:
kids with learning disorders also can have behavioral problems, particularly surrounding school, school work, or homework.
this is in part due to the fact that school is a trigger for them because they are frustrated with how hard it is for them. Kids who find learning harder than the other kids in their class may have an undiagnosed learning disorder and feel embarrassed or ashamed that they cannot keep up in school.
because of this, they may find it to be better or easier to get in trouble than be embarrassed and may start an argument with other kids.
alternatively, they may lash out in school or while doing homework because they are feeling immensely frustrated with the fact that they don’t understand the material.
Sensory Processing Disorder:
when kids have a difficult time processing sensory information, this can lead to sensory overload. Sensory overload is when their senses feel overwhelmed and can result in an outburst.
it may seem like it comes out of nowhere, or like it is a disproportionate reaction. For instance, a kid with SPD may throw things if they are somewhere that is getting too loud for them, or scream if their face gets wet.
they may also refuse to wear or touch things that feel uncomfortable to them and, when their parents or teachers test this, they tend to have a temper tantrum.
kids with SPD also tend to be rigid about routines and if their routine is thrown off, this can trigger an outburst as well.
Autism:
a child who is on the spectrum will also be rigid about routines, rules, and rituals and may have outbursts when their routines are interrupted.
this is because these parameters provide them with emotional comfort and cause them to thrive.
however, sometimes life gets in the way and they need to go somewhere new or change their routine that day, which causes them emotional discomfort.
another reason a child who has autism may be more prone to meltdowns is because they may lack the language to express their needs or may be nonverbal.
this is a frustrating situation for them and whoever else is involved because it makes communication more difficult, resulting in the child having a meltdown.
Something that is important to note is that, on top of any of these symptoms and disorders, there are also the possibility of somatic symptoms, or symptoms that a child may feel physically in their body. This creates an added layer of why a child may be reacting emotionally, becoming irritable, or exhibiting behavioral issues–perhaps their mental health is causing them to feel physically ill as well.
Additionally, with each of these symptoms and disorders, a child will need more patience, practice, and prompting when it comes to de-escalation.
If your child has been exhibiting behavioral problems and you think it may be due to any of these causes listed above, and you feel like you could use some support in terms of a child therapist, family therapist, or parent coaching, reach out to Amel Counseling & Consulting today to schedule a free, 15-minute phone consultation.
