Talking About Bullying With Your Child

Being bullied can be a really traumatic experience for a child. It can do major damage to their self esteem.

You may want to rush in like Mama Bear or The Hulk. Maybe you are paralyzed with fear. Fear of doing or saying the wrong thing. It’s OK. It is important to keep in mind some of the reasons why kids bully each other, such as to establish power, become more popular, insecurities, issues/ instability at home, and aggression issues. Although it does not excuse the behavior, it’s helpful to understand it in order to hopefully change it.

Getting bullied can diminish your child’s self-confidence. Constant bullying causes immense psychological stress and some children can experience anxiety, and/or symptoms of depression. It can have long-term effects on kids, and really skew their sense of self. It can break down their motivation to attend school resulting in grades dropping, socialization lessening, and self-isolating.

Unfortunately, you can’t single-handedly prevent your child from being bullied or eradicate it altogether. Talking about bullying– such as explaining to your child how to handle it, encouraging communication about it, informing them on what they can expect if it does happen, and what you want them to do if they have a friend being bullied– is one of the best ways to make a difference.

5 good ways to talk about bullying with your kids

Warn your child

  • Talk about what bullying is and what it’s not

  • Explain the difference between conflict, a mean moment, and bullying

  • Stress that you want your child to tell you

  • Explain cyber bullying

  • Teach them to not engage

Fortify your child

  • Educate your child about the reasons why a bully might bully others

  • Answer any questions they may have

  • Explain that bullying says more about the bully than the victim

  • Teach them to resist the “herd effect” and do not follow along with bullies

  • Encourage your child to stand up for friends/ they will do the same

  • Roleplay appropriate responses

    • Practice dialogue with your child about how to respond to bulliesDiscuss solutions

    • It helps to come up with some ways to respond in advance so your child feels ready

    • You want to make sure they don’t add fuel to the fire

    • When a child is embarrassed or humiliated, they may freeze up or react in a way that makes them feel worse, so roleplaying helps

Communicate with the school

  • Most schools do have bullying education

  • Make sure schools are encouraging respect, support, and empathy among peers

  • Always talk to the school if there are issues with your child and a bully or one of their peers and a bully

  • Communicating about what is happening and what your expectations ensure the situation will be handled in a way you see fit

  • In extreme cases, law enforcement may need to be contacted as well as the school

  • The top priority is the welfare of your child

Encourage allying

  • Encourage your child to make deals with friends where they have each other’s backs

  • Friends standing up for friends, at the moment, where the bullying is actually taking place can make a huge difference

  • Always teach kids not to go along with bullies, especially if their friends are being targeted

  • Teach your child to stand up for what’s right and be loyal to their morals

Although bullying can be a very upsetting situation for your child and you as parents, it is important to handle it in the best way possible and as level-headed as you can.

As always, if you need more support from a child or teen therapist, reach out to Amel Counseling for a free, 15-minute phone consultation. We have therapists who are ready and willing to support your family and your child through tough situations with peers and bullying in schools, or any mental health issues that have come up as a result of this.

 
 

BEGIN COUNSELING FOR Children IN PHILADELPHIA, PA

You and your child deserve support in overcoming your anxiety symptoms. Our team understands that this is much easier said than done. So, we would like to offer support from our Philadelphia, PA-based therapy practice. To start your therapy journey, please follow these simple steps:

  1. Contact Amel Counseling

  2. Meet with a caring therapist

  3. Get the support and tools to start living a full life!

OTHER SERVICES OFFERED WITH AMEL THERAPY

Counseling for children isn't the only service offered by our team of therapists. Our Philadelphia, PA-based practice offers a variety of services both in-person and online. Mental health services offered include therapy for trauma, grief, and play therapy. We offer support for children, teens and kids of color, and parents. We also offer support groups including worry warriors, culturally confident teen group, and teen girls group. You can also learn more by visiting our blog or by learning more about our team today!