Kids & a Healthy Relationship with Technology

for parents and guardians

You might have noticed that kids lately often want to spend more time on their tablet, watching TV, or playing video games than anything outdoors or playing with toys. Perhaps it is a common argument in your household, as you yourself were raised playing four square, kick the can, hide and seek, and dolls with friends. 

However, our kids’ generation has been raised with access to a lot more technology than their parents’ generation, and times are changing. Kids want to be with the times and play the latest games, know all the current YouTube stars, learn the new TikTok dances, and watch all the popular TV shows. 

Here are some tips for parents to help their kids develop a healthy relationship with technology.

  1. Not all screen time is the same.

    • There are some screen based activities that are damaging and addictive

    • There are some screen based activities that have the potential for learning

    • Learning and connecting are good uses of screens

    • There are risks and dangers, as well as benefits

  2. Set limits.

    • Decide what is a healthy and realistic limit for internet time

    • Set the limit for your kid but also your whole family

    • Make sure the boundaries are clear

    • Explain why the limit is necessary (risks, addiction, dangerous sites, brain development)

    • Use parental controls that can relax as your kid gets older

  3. Encourage caution.

    • Teach kids to be mindful about what they consume

    • Have no tolerance for online/ cyber bullying

    • What they say online can have serious real-world consequences

  4. Discuss the dangers and risks.

    • Talk to your child about the risks of social media 

    • Online predators, cyberbullying, age-inappropriate content, stress, anxiety, addiction, and impairing brain development/ ability to concentrate are all potential risks

    • Teach them how to use internet privacy tools and how to be protective of their personal information online

  5. Monitor.

    • Make sure they are heeding your warnings, rules, and respecting your boundaries

    • Be mindful of their online behavior

    • Kids sometimes take risks and push boundaries even though they know it is wrong

    • Some kids struggle with impulse control

    • Help them make good decisions by making sure they are doing so

  6. Encourage media literacy.

    • Make sure your kids know not to believe everything they see and read

    • Encourage them to research something for themselves

  7. Be the role model.

    • You cannot expect your kids to practice healthy screen time rules if you are not following them yourself

    • If you are on your phone 24/7 they will not believe you about the risks of overusing screens

    • Encourage times when the whole family is engaged with something that does not require use of a screen

    • Enjoying meals together, board games, reading books, playing sports, going to the library, going to the movies/ having a movie night are all great activities that you can engage in together rather than all separately staring at your devices

  8. Recognize the signs of addiction.

    • If your child is displaying signs of irritability when they are more active with the screens, they could be addicted to their devices

    • Try to notice if they are able to put it down without displaying signs of distress

    • Sometimes teens might say things like they get anxious if they can’t check their phone

    • Sometimes kids will become more argumentative, less focused, less patient, more hyper, less creative, less social, more self-isolating, or less interested in other aspects of their lives if they are addicted to tablets, phones, TV, video games, or other devices

    • Some kids may even display more “traditional” symptoms of addiction like not eating, not sleeping, twitching, becoming dysregulated, and more.

If your child is struggling with their relationship with technology such as social media, texting with friends, video games, TV, YouTube, and more, your child and family may need some extra support beyond these tips. Reach out to Amel Counseling & Consulting today and schedule a free, 15-minute consultation with one of our kid and teen counselors and see what we can do for you!


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